Underpaid Stoners....??!!

Sushi News: 

Gentle Austin Sushi News Readers,

Your humble scribe hath spoketh beyond the pale and received a good tongue lashing for his efforts by none other than the Austin Chronicle's top culinary exponent, Virginia Wood. Aye, I was a bit hasty when I scribeth, "underpaid stoners," to describe the mild-mannered souls who created the 2004 Chronicle's Critic's Restaurant Poll.

According to Virginia (who is a trained pastry chef with two college degrees, 25 years experience working in restaurants and other food businesses as well as 11 years of experience at the Chronicle), there are six contributing writers to the Chronicle's Critic's Poll. Four are trained chefs; two have published well-received books in the food and wine field; three have advanced degrees; and several of them contribute work to publications in addition to the Chronicle. And, as far as she knows, none of them is a stoner.

What can I say except that I have single-handedly caused Austin Sushi News to sink into a moral abyss? Myself, our distinguished staff: Spitboy and Gingermilk, and our feisty assemblage of spies, grifters, and gossips, have tried our best to maintain the dignity and integrity that befits our lofty position as the Sushi concierge for Austin's bons vivants.

And yet, this one slip of the pen; this one sarcastic, foolhardy, barb, hath caused Virginia to remove herself from our midst. Aye, she no longer dwells with the list, and thus will never receive this message -- this message of sorrowful angst.

Oh Virginia! Creator of peanut butter pie! Arbitor of taste! Ambassadoress of culinary good will! Come back to us!!!